curiosity is contagious

“Amber Rae is the Brené Brown of Wonder.”
— Mind Body Green

 
 
 
 
DNJ_AmberRae_2E0A3943_ScreenRes_BW.jpg
 

press

 
color-blocks-white.jpg
 
 
Hey_Love.png
 
 
_v1b.png

I'm Amber Rae—an author, artist, and speaker who encourages emotional wellness and personal growth.

My work explores how to free ourselves from the stories that stifle our potential, and what it takes to live as our truest, most courageous selves.

Read my story
 
_v2b.png

I'm the bestselling author of Choose Wonder Over Worry.

Blending raw-and-relatable stories with actionable strategies, it’s a guide to face your fears and create a life that reflects who you truly are.

Deepak Chopra called it a map to "unfold your infinite potential" and Bustle said it's "the one advice book you should read — even if you don't like self-help."

BUY NOW
 
_v5b.png

I empower audiences to unlock their true potential.

Called “relatable, awe-inspiring, and a breath of fresh air,” I give talks and host workshops that engage audiences and inspire change.

Whether presenting on stage to thousands or hosting a group in an intimate setting, together we'll create a space of curiosity, vulnerability, and transformation.

Learn More
 
banner-striped1d.jpg
 
 
 

Let's Stay In Touch

 
 
color-blocks-white.jpg
 

Daily Inspo

#OldieButGoodie | An aspiring writer emailed me the other day, saying, “I have so many doubts and fears about putting my work out there. So much so that I’m NOT creating anything. Any tips?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Here’s the gist of what I shared: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 1️⃣ Make Friends With Your Doubt. Rather than seeing it as an enemy, acknowledge that your fear and doubt are trying to protect and keep you safe from humiliation. We all experience doubt. It’s part of being human. It’s what you do with it that matters. Which leads me to...⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 2️⃣ Question Your Doubts. Our doubts are often over-dramatic and fearful stories about who we think we are and what we think we are capable of. Our doubts are not the truth. So question your doubts by asking: Where did this belief come from? What if the opposite were true? What evidence do I have to prove the opposite is true? Knowing the opposite can be true, what is my next right move? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 3️⃣ Name It To Tame It. To separate who I am from the many doubting voices inside my head, I’ve named my inner critics. There’s Anxious Annie, Debbie Doubter, Grace the perfectionist, and many more. This helps me distance myself from the parts of me that want to stay small, play safe, or run away. By giving it a name, it loses its power. My favorite tip? Writing them a letter to inform them of the important adventure we are embarking on, and the role they can and CANNOT play. (Boundaries!)⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 4️⃣ Call on Inner Wisdom. The wise women within me also have names. There’s The Goddess, Zoë the creative bestie, Momma Jenny the wise elder, and more. I frequently pull out my journal and engage in conversation with them—asking for guidance on my next steps and what to do when feeling shaky. They’re my favorite navigation system. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 5️⃣ ACT. As Van Gogh once said, “If you hear a voice within you say ‘You cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.” 🔥 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #choosewonder #decodingthefeels #allthefeels
WEDDING REAL TALK // In ONE week, our love & wonder wedding adventure in Morocco begins. Here’s a lil’ wedding art I made to channel all the feels, inspired by the art magic of @meeraleepatel. (If you don’t know her art already, go check it out. So much beauty and depth.) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Real talk: planning our wedding (even with amazing planners) has been a combo of I-love-you-to-the-moon *and* I-want-to-strangle-you. 😂 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Farhad and I have *very* different and opposite work styles, and collaboration has been an edge for us. I love details; he’s big picture. I’m proactive; he’s reactive. I’m controlling; he’s casual. I’m structured; he’s unstructured. I worry someone will get too drunk; he doesn’t care. I always meet deadlines; he forgets deadlines exist. You get the picture. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ There have been a few times where I thought, “Oh my - can we do this? Can we build a life together if we can’t plan a wedding together?” He reassured me, “planning a wedding is not planning a life. I get to marry you. All the other details are a bonus.” (Good answer, though I found it annoying at first. 😂) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Our journey here has felt like an INITIATION, and I’m grateful for it. He’s a mirror for my areas of growth, and I’m a mirror for his. One thing is for sure: Each tiny conflict is having us uplevel our communication and increase our capacity for discomfort. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ One communication frame we’ve been practicing to balance out our edges is, “I’m willing to shift X if you’re willing to do Y.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Example: “I’m willing to relinquish control if you’re willing to communicate more proactively.” And then, we get specific on what that looks like in practice for each of us. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It’s. Been. A. Ride. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As for this next week, I AM relinquishing control and calling in presence, pleasure, ease, magic, and unconditional love. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I love you to the moon @farhadini *and* I’m grateful we get to work out these kinks along the way. 💏 #MrAndMrsWonder
By popular request, a monthly fill-in reflection + intention setting template ✨ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Hundreds of you are asking me if I’m making my art into prints, and the short answer is SOON—I have a few things up my sleeve. May is my MONTH OF LOVE so I’m off to get married first. 💏 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ P.s. I’m messaged a lot if it’s okay to reshare my work. As always, I’m grateful when you re-share, and I ask that you tag me in the photo and post, and don’t adjust the colors. ❤️ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ P.p.s. If you post with answers, please tag me so I can see. I always get so excited. 🤩
I just wrapped up two keynotes in the last few days, and I’m feeling a lot of gratitude that I get to do this work. I’m inspired by how ready people are to get real and raw, and talk about their inner emotional worlds. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I always love when we get to the Q&A part of talks because it tells me what’s in people’s hearts. One woman asked about how they can get their family member or partner to open up and share their feelings, and another asked how to support her young daughter in unleashing her potential and gifts. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Different questions with the same answer: We start with ourselves and we teach by example. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If we want our partner to open up about their feelings, we start by opening up and being vulnerable with them first. If we want to encourage our daughter to unleash her potential and gifts, we first unleash our own potential and gifts. Then, we create an encouraging container for her to do the same. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’m reminded of redwood trees. The way these majestic creatures grow is they first root into the ground and create their own sturdiness. Once anchored, they connect their roots with the other redwood trees around them. That’s how they rise high together. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The same goes for us. When we first root into our own power, it’s from that place that we can most powerfully connect with and amplify the gifts of those around us. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Root, Connect, Rise. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Happy Tuesday, lovelies. ✨✨✨ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 📷 @danielnjohnson
Perfectionism sucks the joy out of living and creating. It’s self-sabotage at its finest. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ At its core, perfectionism is fueled by the underlying belief that “I am not good enough (or thin enough, smart enough, rich enough, successful enough, or ________ enough),” and I need to try harder and harder to get *there.* ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Healthy striving, though? It’s expansive and attainable, rooted in the belief that “No matter what, I am always worthy and enough.” ✨ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ From p. 209 of my book, “Choose Wonder Over Worry.” Want a copy for you or a friend? Head to the link in my bio 👉🏼 @heyamberrae ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #choosewonder
Walking into Wednesday like 🙅🏻‍♀️🕵🏻‍♀️🧘🏻‍♀️🧚🏽‍♀️💃🏻 #decodingthefeels
WHOLENESS is embracing all of it: the mess, the magic, the joy, the pain, the imperfection, the beauty. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Wholeness is what I see as the driving WHY for my work: to guide us beyond our shame and abandonment of the self into full love and acceptance. Acceptance of our cracks, edges, and imperfections. All of it. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It’s the space and place where there’s no more hiding; only embracing. 🙏🏼❤️ #decodingthefeels
My book, “Choose Wonder Over Worry,” completes the journey with WHOLENESS. An except from the book: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “Growing up without my father led me searching to fill the hole of him, without ever knowing there was a hole to fill. I tried to stuff accomplishments and wine and the love and approval of other men into that hole because I thought that by doing so, the hole would go away. But it didn’t go away; it only increased in size. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ That hole, I learned quite painfully, would never be filled by anyone or anything outside of me. Not in my relationships with men, not in how I looked and appeared to others, not in empty bottles of wine, not in what I could or could not accomplish. It was when I came to the terms with the heartbreaking fact that I would never find my father, and I would never fill his void, that I began the journey home to myself. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ That void of him is part of me, and the work was not to deny it, but to embrace it. It was to look at the void, and say: Thank you, void. Thank you for your confusion and your pain and your gaping hole in my heart. Thank you, gaping hole in my heart, for sending me on an all-consuming quest for love and approval outside of me. Thank you for being a part of me. Thank you for thrusting me into the realization that love is not out there, it is *in me.* ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It was when I learned to stop seeing every interaction through the lens of “Do you love and approve of me?” and instead through the lens of “Do I love and approve of me?”, that I learned to climb out of the hole I was so accustomed to digging myself into. And when I climbed out of that hole, I found what I had always ached to feel but never knew I was looking for: wholeness. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Wholeness didn’t come through denying any part of myself, or trying to heal my cracks. It came through taking all the parts of myself that I was rejecting, and saying: I see you. I love you. I accept you. You’re safe here. Thank you for teaching me. Thank you for being here. I will carry you home.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ — My book “Choose Wonder Over Worry” is available everywhere books are sold. Head to the link in my profile to get yours! ❤️
My favorite way to start the week with clarity and intention? Prompts, of course. 🤩 Here are a few reflections to make the most of your week. 😘 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Tip: try with a partner, friend, colleague, or team to add depth and accountability. 🙌🏼
Feeling a bit overwhelmed? I was too. I made and checked this off and felt muuuuuch better. Hope it serves you, too! Xo
The trick to moving through a hard conversation? Cultivating comfort in discomfort. Staying rather than escaping. Breathing rather than fleeing. Responding rather than reacting. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Who can relate to these stages? 💁🏻‍♀️ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #allthefeels #decodingthefeels
I’ve been trying new things lately with poetry/songwriting and singing. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve NEVER EVER let anyone hear my singing voice. It’s the one thing that has me feel SO INCREDIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE for one tiny/big reason: I’m afraid of sucking at it. And yet, it’s also something I feel deeply drawn toward exploring. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ (Maybe you have something like that too?!) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Last night, @farhadini overheard me singing a few lines, and I felt like crawling under a rock with embarrassment when he poked in the room and said, “Oooh, do that again.” 🙈 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I keep thinking BUT-WHAT-IF-I-AM-TERRIBLE / FAIL / SUCKKK. Well, of course, then I’m just learning, right?! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I was telling a friend (@tonybgoode ❤️) about my singing fears the other day, and he said to me, “What if an aspiring writer came to you and said that she wanted to write a book but was afraid to write the first sentence because it might not be good enough?” 😂 Being a writer for as long as I can remember, I know it can take MANY shitty sentences to get to a good one. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As I explore my comfort zone in new ways this week, I’m reminding myself that I gotta be bad to get better—and “failure” is learning in disguise. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Also: No promises I will sing for you anytime soon 😂, but I will keep practicing those notes 🥰🎶 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What are you focused on practicing? #choosewonderoverworry